snowbird just dreamed of tomorrow
over the last few weeks, i've been hit with the desire to be somebody. there's no nobility in being a call centre monkey. although what i am doing now takes intelligence, it's not really a job that is respected. and it certainly isn't a career. i want to earn more money so i can save and go overseas, and start to set myself up for the future. i want to become an adult finally. and so, i have decided to give uni another go in 2008. and i'm going to become a teacher. i haven't decided on what exactly yet. definitely high school, and either TAS [technical and applied sciences; computers, wood tech, textiles etc] or english/history.
it's so odd. my team leader at triple 0 always said to me that she thought i should become a teacher, and that i'd be good at it. but i never gave it more than a passing thought. and then a couple weeks back, i was sitting on the train going over the bridge as normal, and there were these high school kids and their teacher sitting opposite me on their way to an excursion. and i was watching them interact and it hit me that that's what i want to, and should do.
in this same time, i've found myself alone again. things have pretty much finished with melbourne boy. when i was there he annoyed me, and since i've been back in sydney we've hardly talked. and i haven't missed it. there's been another boy i've had my eye on for a while now, but he has turned out to be pretty much the worst choice in boy ever. though he is crazy good looking. i would still like to make out with him again though, and this annoys me no end because he is not worth my time.
in conclusion, i would like a new boy. i would like one who is tall and lives in sydney. those two are a must. and i would prefer one who listens to good music and has dark hair. it seems this goal is almost impossible. do you have a friend who fits this bill? send him my way. the guy who sits next to me at work would be a good person to fall for. he has all the qualities listed previously. and he seems like a genuine sweetheart. however he has a girlfriend. we've been travelling home together the last few days and he's so easy to talk to. however, he is a triplet, so maybe i should aim for one of his brothers. we're going to meet up in the city on nye, so there's hope yet.
finally, here's some random prose from my train trip home the other night. i started more, and maybe i'll get around to fleshing it out to a complete short story soon.
The carriage stinks of piss. But I don�t move. Don�t make any effort to escape it. I just sit here and think about the word piss. It�s so stark and lewd. It�s not a term I use often, but it�s vastly appropriate here. And I can�t help but imagine my life as some kind of low grade indie flick. They�re fond of using public transport as a backdrop. Maybe cityrail allows you to do it for free.
And with tricky camera techniques they�ll show a montage of me sitting on the same seat on the same train as the people and the scenery change around me contantly. I wonder how long I�d have to sit on the train for them to achieve the desired effect.
But if my life is a film, I�m not at the exciting bit yet. I can�t help but think that I�m stuck in the first thirty minutes that sets up the story.
And again we�re back to the piss. I�ve been trying to block it out by distracting myself. Hah, someone�s picked off the paint on the �s� so it reads �North hore Line� etc, but it isn�t working. People are starting to notice it now. The guy in the suit is looking around his feet for wet spots, and the lady wearing a sun hat even though it�s fricken 8:30pm has gotten up to move. Maybe I should carry around some of my finest product so I can repel annoying people during peak hour.
Yeah I know, I�ve gone on about public urination for ages now. But honestly, this is probably going to be the highlight of my week.
My phone�s ringing! How exciting. This hardly ever happens. In the second or so it takes me to fumble in my bag for it, I fantasise about the conversation I�d die to be having; �Oh hi darling� Yep, almost home. I�m two stops away� No, I haven�t eaten� That sounds lovely� And you�ve got a surprise for me? You�re the best boyfriend ever!� And so on. But in reality I�m so single it hurts, and it�s probably my mum calling. Bingo. �Hi Mum� Yeah, on my way home from work� Yes, it�s perfectly safe on the train at this time of night� I think mace is illegal in Australia� OK, I�ll be over on the weekend� Mum, I have to go, I�m at my stop� OK, love you too� Yes, I am taking my vitamins� Bye.�
See what I mean about the piss?
23/12/2006 19:14